 |
Well the 5 o clock wakeup call did not fluster them, hit the snooze button and get up at 6, no biggie. An uneventful journey to Heathrow only punctuated by Stiff Little Fingers and their live album `Hanx` Awesome LP. Well T4 was its usual bag of shite, or as my friends at Bookers would say….Shite in a bucket. But was thoroughly searched ,quizzed and allowed to proceed where fags and coffee was purchased and we actually fucked off on time .Amazing !!!!!! Flight whizzed by 2 hours of music followed by the walking dead S2 E1, some film in Norwegian with the old subtitles and an aggressive game of chess against the wily old PC, which I won cause I had more pieces left……end of. Newark has not changed much ,however got thru their customs and sat enjoying a pint of Samuel Adams 45 minutes after landing awaiting the 14-47 departure to Boston. Now this is where it goes a bit full frontal (tits up to anyone from NE Hampshire), finally took off at 15-30 , and can you believe it sat on the plane for an hour watching the cup final, I think it was in and JT is still a fucking cunt. So little bro at 6`1” has now awoken so will put blog away and converse…….like being back at bookers this….forced smile and be nice to people…AAAAAAAAAAAAarghhhhhhhhh. Want to know why we waited 45mins to take off….drum roll plz…..so we could land on time…I shit you not 40 fucking minute flight , straight onto train and then walked to hostel, found it real easy due to my psychic map reading and a lot of luck, quick shower and off to Chandlers inn, the only stereotyping missing was an Indian, builder, cop, cowboy and a biker performing YMCA…it was that gay a bar , but Sam Adams went down a treat which is not surprising considering where we were. Sharply headed off to Mcgreeveys bar owned by Ken Casey of the dropkick murphys not the author, and that was great, Guinness at $5 and a Rubens sandwich for 10. Got very wankered and could not resist a nightcap at Chandlers, just had to be done.LOL. Well I awoke feeling rougher than Frasers rectum after a night out with the boys, that was until James arose, it was like the walking dead again…..bless him. Took in the free breakfast and developed a plan of action, map studied and route decided on off we set 45mins later am sat outside Fenway Park in a bar(in case you were wondering) watching Man U v Swansea, O dear Alex where did it all go wrong????? Scalped a couple of baseball tickets for $20 apiece and off we set….up them stairs guys, well we climbed and climbed said hello to Jack, and climbed, bumped into the giant and climbed, eventually ending up on the roof top terrace, which is an accurate description, found a chair and was ready to play ball. Got swiftly kicked out of said chair…….thems standing tickets boys…meet the wife and sister….which one is she…wot you mean boy ???????? Any way I digress, game starts bish bosh bish 1st batter out, in comes the next guy for Baltimore, whack….fetch… that’s a home run the ball is smelted to fuck knows where, an ominous start. Into the 3rd innings 1-0 Baltimore up comes the same guy for his 2nd go……don`t even bother looking that ball is in Maine somewhere , in cricket terminology he really middled that one…..out the stadium and gone half way down Lansdowne Street. At 5-0, bottom of the 5th, getting ready to exit the red sox managed to pack all the bases which don`t sound like much, but had not got past 1st base up till then. Up comes Middlebrook, Grand Slam opportunity, and swiftly puts the ball even further down Lansdowne st. Game on, half way and its 5-5, shame the game reverted back to type and in the 8th innings we left…. The game went into overtime, 17 innings, 6 hours and 8 minutes, thank fuck we left, 6 fucking hours that would of finished James off.( Lobster boy is well and truly back). Back to hostel shower et al, and all ready for the trailer park boys. What a show, fucking brilliant, those that have not watched the programme, really are missing out. Julian, Ricky and Bubbles with special guests Corey, Trevor and the Green Bastard from parts unknown, last but not least Mr Conky……Patrick Swayze….. won`t eulogise too much suffice to say it was Deee Cent. No Conky t shirts tho….gutted. A couple of beers on the way home and an earlyish night, will leave it there as getting ready to hit the Samuel Adams brewery. All the best. Me and Him |
Monday, 7 May 2012
Hi and welcome to Bo Stoned
Thursday, 17 March 2011
Those that can do. The rest can fuck off.
And now the end is near and so I face my final curtain.
Yes folks am sitting in Brisbanes departure lounge waiting for Michelle to turn up to say goodbye.
It will not be pretty as things have moved on and Saturday morning we got engaged. This will not make my life easier I know , but when you know ,you know ,right !!!!.
The last two weeks have been spent enjoying the weather , spending time with M and catching up with all things English with Phil, from watching England magnificently despatch S.Africa ,to ballsing it up against Bangladesh. From the shots blowing a two goal lead to winning back to back games for the first time since I don’t know when. With a bit of fishing and sun bathing throw in.
So what have I discovered on this journey of a lifetime, well that it’s a small world and no matter were you go you will know someone who knows someone that once shagged your mates daughter. Also that people are generally so friendly once they drop there barriers from Jezza and Mat in LA to Dave from Phuket ,Steve from Koh Tao, lets be honest how many people do you meet that just give you cocaine, not try to sell it just give you it, there must be a saying somewhere that goes along the lines of when a man has everything his soul needs what does he need the rest for, if there isn’t one there should be .
So am now trying to work out what the fuck do I do now, cause honestly I haven’t a fooking clue.
Anyway highlites of the last few months, for any one who saw the twin towers ,seeing the mess that’s still there now, American Idiot broadway show really fucking well done.Dancing my little legs off at Frank’s Washington gig. Arguing the toss with train staff because in the words of J.Cleese ‘ is this the place to come for an argument….yes it is ….no it isn’t…ur just contradicting everything I’m saying….no I’m not’
From the beauty and size of Jacksonville, to catching up with old and new friends in Sarasota, driving an automatic on the wrong side of the road. To drinking for two weeks in what looked the roughest bar in Florida ala trainspotting, only to be told by numerous taxi drivers its one of the best and the safest……who the fuck would mess with a bar full of Harley Davison riders.
From being tormented to death by the woman in 20 F and not being able to stick $20 on the eagles to beat the redskins.
My first time ever in a strip joint and having parts of me put in parts of someone else without my permission, a willing victim I agree, I was suffering from Stockholm syndrome. You try to prove otherwise!!!!
Catching up with an old school friend who`s living the dream in LA.
From actually being on a plane with not enough fuel to make it’s destination ,fucking Qantas I swear never a fucking again , you suck so bad you make the redskins look like world beaters. This brought in an additional stop to refuel in Brisbane which I suppose is ironic as I would make a good taxi driver there as I know it better than most of the drivers who can’t even use the sat nav they have got, surely you don’t get a visa to be a taxi driver ????.
Sydney harbour bridge should go down as a worlds wonder if not already, Sydneys Kings Cross is about as seedy as Ash Hill estate well overrated.
Now where do I begin with Brisbane, from being at the 1st test on the 1st day of the Ashes will long live in the memory ,the fickleness of the typical aussie ( and they call us whingers, fuck me tossers reel ur fucking neck in).
Oh and now there’s Michelle, and into each life a little rain must fall, as the song goes .Well it’s bloody pissed down at times literally,and others were gloriously stupendous, but more about that later.
Off to Thailand and what a lovely bunch of people they are especially away from your Phukets etc, Guys, those that know Neil for fucks sake get in touch and get to see life from a locals point of view, it’s all mega chilled and so easy to see how people stay there years, fed and watered and pissed and if you put a bit of effort into it laid as well for a £10 come on guys why are you wasting ur time on Europe.
On to organising my own little adventure back to Brisbane to see the lovely Michelle which had it’s high and lows and highs again, it rained which is true to form, but the sun shone at times I even managed to get burnt, seeing the joy on Phils face when I introduced him to live streaming, imagining the horror on Lily’s when she found out.
Watching live sky sports at 4 in the morning is a surreal thing even worse it was the Mancs v Crawley.
Some how getting well into aussie racing, and just praying they send Black Caviar over to Royal Ascot, she will sort out my money worries .
Booking a flight home on my own, is not going to happen again I promise.
Actually catching a fish was awesome , getting to eat it was better.
Being all dominant and demanding someones attendance at the airport to wanting to say sorry mate don’t want this flight after all, crying at texts and back to feeling a complete bastard.
Then landing at Heathrow and seeing your mates again, a pint of real ale and dreams of the Wreck on Saturday.
Now the hard bit, as this is not the end merely a stepping stone onto the next phase of my journey, will really have to be on top form to get this one sorted.
So it’s goodnight from me.
To be continued…………
All the best
Ian
Monday, 28 February 2011
What Ben Elton really wishes he had the balls to say , but just won’t.
Well have to say the Aussies are very wifi unfriendly ,it is almost impossible to get it free, even Mcyds have removed all their power points to ensure you don’t stay too long even the library is protected and you need to use your details to get on.
Jesus even in the capital of capitalism wifi was free everywhere , never had to pay at all in the states, not sure what UK is like ,will find out soon enough.
So the mornings bets are on and I have found Golden Virginia tobacco and menthol filters so it is all good, am staying out of town near Garden City which is just a huge shopping centre , bigger than Aldershot ficking huge it is , called Westfield I think like that one in Shepherds’ Bush.
Saw someone get a ticket last night for jaywalking would of laughed but not home yet and I must be odds on to get one myself the lights are so slow here it’s as if Ken Livingstone has been playing with them.
So hit the Guinness last night in a plastic paddy pub , a bit on the warm side but was very smooth and drinkable as I watched the Irish go down to Bangladesh, 4 an over guys think about it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why go for big shots, tip and run will do.
Not sure what the coverage of the NZ earthquake is like there, but here it is still front page and some of the stories are fucking heartbreaking , so much worse than the flooding as they knew that was coming. Was almost in tears yesterday reading about a brother and sister trapped in a hotel, yep a hard nosed bastard like me. Have you guys seen that hotel leaning like an Italian builders dream, fuck when that goes down its going to take another load of buildings with it, then there’s the classroom of Japanese kids who the NZ plod have given up as dead, so the nips have there own guys working on it. Really is heartbreaking to watch this unravel.
I suppose the news back home is the north African states deciding they don’t want to be ruled by an American backed dictator any more and will sell there oil to whoever they want. Cameron and co must be trying to work out a spin that don’t make them look like the hypocritical cunts they are……yeah get rid of Gaddafi he‘s a cruel tyrant….no that guy in Bahrain who’s dictated that country for 40 years he’s OK, he lets us park our navy there so that we can threaten Iran, who we of course, would like to see deposed and replaced by a western puppet who will plunder his nations riches buying US arms and propping up the biggest industrial force in the US economy.
It’s very similar to the Aussie immigration policy, it seems that providing you reach these shores you will be let in, eventually. But there is an underlying opinion that there are good immigrants and bad immigrants.
Nips/ zipper heads are considered good , hard workers and contribute and blend in with society, and then there’s the ragheads- Afghans, Iranians generally anyone from the middle east.
They tend to stick with there own do not mix, want there own religion and as we all know the old Islam is not the most tolerant of religions is it. It’s just a pity that no fucker here has the balls to say it, and when they do come close to it they are forced to apologise and cow down although they have only stated what 60% of true Australians are thinking.
Personally have never understood why countries let these people who claim asylum from their country, who have passed countless other places, to get to here in the first place you know if Afghanistan/Iran is that bad why not go to the nearest other country, not fucking travel in a fucking row boat for 6 bloody weeks to get to Australia, that is not what a genuine asylum seeker would do ,it’s what a economic migration seeker would do. And another thing that kills me is this boat load that crashed on Xmas Island WA, the kids whose parents croaked en route are staying with fucking relatives ??????? No real issues with that , makes perfect sense, but these relatives no doubt came over as asylum seekers themselves, gained the right to stay here and you really expect me to believe that they had nothing to do with there family also fleeing their homeland and coming to Oz ?????????? Come on, if these fuckers are so harshly treated back home where the fuck did they get $35,000 to pay the people smugglers to get them out of where ever. especially when all they need to do is pay $500 ,get a flight to Oz and claim asylum on landing, seriously you guys are being taken for cunts, I should know ,the same shit has, and still is happening back home and there’s nothing our lily livered bleeding fucking heart government will do about it. It breaks my fucking heart to now see the fucking Africans here, the majority of these people will bleed your country dry as they are doing in England now, I really hope you have some long term plans to get rid of these thieves or at least keep an eye on them.
Anyways I just can’t wait until Mayday lets have 50,000 people take to the streets demanding a curb to the capitalist excess’s of the banks etc , watch the police react with baton charges , kettling tactics, which we must prepare for, horseback charges and tear gassing by riot cops.
Will the US and UN demand sanctions against the UK or will it just turn a blind eye like it did in Tiannerman Square and does to Isreal on a weekly basis. It is the sovereign right of all governments to protect its democracy any way it feels fit yada yada yada. Unless of course we don’t like you or you don’t do what we want you to do then we will demand sanctions and freeze the bank accounts of your nation, has anyone asked why US banks are looking after Gaddafi’s money what a bunch of fucking hypocrites.
Oh and I have chilled out over the weekend and watched a bit of TV and saw ‘Girl who kicked hornets nest’ its OK ,but looking forward to the Hollywood version. Hollywood ??????? See the Oscars are as bollixed as usual.
Anyway back at the Minto in Brisbane’s South Bank, flight home booked for the 14th and back on the 15th so have two weeks to get a tan.
Have run out of photo’s so use your imagination.
All the best.
Ian
Thursday, 24 February 2011
So I just have to talk about the dogs, track is inside a trotting track, therefore 100yards from the stand, unlike back home when right in front of you, about 100 people there at most and only one stand like the yanks but this stand was not a touch on the ones in the good olde US of A. Got there for race 2 ,so having studied the form which there isn’t any decided trap 2 was the winner and the placings filled by 3-7 so armed with my $10 did a combo trifecta, first 3 any order 2-3-7. Over here they get the dogs upto the fence and send the hare round so the dogs get a look at it, T2 went mental so I had $10 on a win as well and fuck me 20 yards from line its 2-7-3 fan fucking tastic thinks I then T2 decides to let T7 catch up with it and take a lump out of it,loses momentum and T3 comes on the outside and wins, was not happy, still I had the Trifecta and that paid me $120. Pissed about with a few forecasts and actually picked a couple more winners including a 10/1 shot, part time ninja what a cool name and all I had was $3 on it.
Anyway soon had enough when my nap of the meeting was backed from 5/4 into ½ and was soundly beaten so hit the valley for a few beers and waddled off home, so am now in town leeching wifi where ever I can find it.
Well having lent out my ipod charger only for it to break,I refuse to pay $40 for a new one so have plugged it into the PC and hope it charges without wiping my music, if that happens at least will have plenty to do when I go back. Got an email today telling me that another of my ex work mates has come over, Jesus will know more people here than back home at this rate.
So M came round on Friday for an al fresco meal of steak and salad and talked her into doing the footy Brisbane v Gold Coast Phil had sorted out tickets so after an afternoon of unsuccessful gambling met up and off we went well the £30 I had on Brisbane was never really in doubt 2-0 at half time and coasted (get it) to an easy victory, we left at the hour mark to meet up in the Valley with Phil and Lily and spent a very pleasant evening getting drunk at the Tempo cause some bars have a `no shorts` rule especially it seems when they are busy…..cock sucking wankers.
So did not get to see rooneys goal but from what I heard just like Brisbane’s 2nd but another well invested £20 , just a fucking shame I also doubled them up with the mighty Shots, seems we are going back to the days of KD already, pray it was a blip and won’t happen again.
And then it seems M locked herself out I was passed out and had to wake up the owners at 3am ish to let her in, still woke up to a lovely message scrawled on my chest informing me of said crime, so have a bit of making up to do.
Today is Sunday and on Koh Tao that mean’s a roast here am more inclined to think curry, just not sure which yet, but will hit the shop for inspiration, wine and a paper.
Curry was good and spent the evening exchanging texts and watching TV.
Well Monday is here and its Valentines day, and not sure if M is about or not ,so will wait and see as the texts last night just got weirder and then surreal. So spent the evening with M discussing shit and then more shit and still no wiser ,still a nice evening and pleasant company and almost an early night.
Now it is Wednesday, what happened to Tuesday ? You may well ask, not a bloody lot, quite forgettable, spent a night watching TV awaiting texts which were few and far between , but a reason was given.
M is off to Adelaide till Monday at the earliest so am looking for other accommodation as this place is now far to like home so need to get away
from here, have enquired into the Minto which is nice enough but a bit out of town. Well no room at the inn as Joesethus would say.
Had two days of rain now and it seems the authorities have had a change of heart as they have released the dam water, so does that mean I am a soothsayer or just have a bit of savvy…..who knows !!!!
Anyway , hopefully there is a room here for another 10 days then look at becoming homeward bound.
Well that was a week ago and what have I done ? Not a damn lot , M’s been away with work for a few days so was left to my own devices so the valley was hit on Friday night and was mega fun , also do not call a kiwi an aussie it seems to send them in a hulk like rage, pity cause it made me laugh. The weekend was spent with Phil and Lily watching sky sports and the live footy, think Phils life will never be the same now he knows how to stream live footy off the net.God bless P2P.eu. Sunday spent fishing and yet again Rex Hunt I am not but did get to see a large muddy.
So have until Friday here, the Minto from Monday for 7 days which puts me here till the 7th March, just need to find something for this weekend, sauna pool and steam room seem very appealing at the moment, so a weekend living it up, chill at minto were the wifi is really free and book a flight home looks to be the order of things.
Not a lot more to add other than last nights flash floods and an afternoon of thunderstorms that lasted well into the night.
Well Tuesday flew by so fast I don’t actually remember anything other than betting on a horse called Captain Darling which lost.
Wednesday brought more rain , but also a rather large dose of sunshine which made the day more bearable, also the hostel now has free wifi…..yeeehaaaa.
So Thursday is here and shit it’s been a rough few months for this part of the world floods, cyclones, earthquakes and fucking incompetent politicians.
So have been assured am in for a night of sin as am going out of town tomorrow as the hotel is a bit rural `handy for the Gabba` it said , well yeah if you have fucking wings!!!!!!!
Typical , I move out of town and the races are on with 3 x group 1 races, finding a bus to where I need to go took most of the morning, who the fuck puts a bus station in a fucking shopping centre ????????
So that’s all for now ….except how shit were England the other night.
No one in particular.
All the best.
Ian
Anyway soon had enough when my nap of the meeting was backed from 5/4 into ½ and was soundly beaten so hit the valley for a few beers and waddled off home, so am now in town leeching wifi where ever I can find it.
Well having lent out my ipod charger only for it to break,I refuse to pay $40 for a new one so have plugged it into the PC and hope it charges without wiping my music, if that happens at least will have plenty to do when I go back. Got an email today telling me that another of my ex work mates has come over, Jesus will know more people here than back home at this rate.
So M came round on Friday for an al fresco meal of steak and salad and talked her into doing the footy Brisbane v Gold Coast Phil had sorted out tickets so after an afternoon of unsuccessful gambling met up and off we went well the £30 I had on Brisbane was never really in doubt 2-0 at half time and coasted (get it) to an easy victory, we left at the hour mark to meet up in the Valley with Phil and Lily and spent a very pleasant evening getting drunk at the Tempo cause some bars have a `no shorts` rule especially it seems when they are busy…..cock sucking wankers.
So did not get to see rooneys goal but from what I heard just like Brisbane’s 2nd but another well invested £20 , just a fucking shame I also doubled them up with the mighty Shots, seems we are going back to the days of KD already, pray it was a blip and won’t happen again.
And then it seems M locked herself out I was passed out and had to wake up the owners at 3am ish to let her in, still woke up to a lovely message scrawled on my chest informing me of said crime, so have a bit of making up to do.
Today is Sunday and on Koh Tao that mean’s a roast here am more inclined to think curry, just not sure which yet, but will hit the shop for inspiration, wine and a paper.
Curry was good and spent the evening exchanging texts and watching TV.
Well Monday is here and its Valentines day, and not sure if M is about or not ,so will wait and see as the texts last night just got weirder and then surreal. So spent the evening with M discussing shit and then more shit and still no wiser ,still a nice evening and pleasant company and almost an early night.
Now it is Wednesday, what happened to Tuesday ? You may well ask, not a bloody lot, quite forgettable, spent a night watching TV awaiting texts which were few and far between , but a reason was given.
M is off to Adelaide till Monday at the earliest so am looking for other accommodation as this place is now far to like home so need to get away
from here, have enquired into the Minto which is nice enough but a bit out of town. Well no room at the inn as Joesethus would say.
Had two days of rain now and it seems the authorities have had a change of heart as they have released the dam water, so does that mean I am a soothsayer or just have a bit of savvy…..who knows !!!!
Anyway , hopefully there is a room here for another 10 days then look at becoming homeward bound.
Well that was a week ago and what have I done ? Not a damn lot , M’s been away with work for a few days so was left to my own devices so the valley was hit on Friday night and was mega fun , also do not call a kiwi an aussie it seems to send them in a hulk like rage, pity cause it made me laugh. The weekend was spent with Phil and Lily watching sky sports and the live footy, think Phils life will never be the same now he knows how to stream live footy off the net.God bless P2P.eu. Sunday spent fishing and yet again Rex Hunt I am not but did get to see a large muddy.
So have until Friday here, the Minto from Monday for 7 days which puts me here till the 7th March, just need to find something for this weekend, sauna pool and steam room seem very appealing at the moment, so a weekend living it up, chill at minto were the wifi is really free and book a flight home looks to be the order of things.
Not a lot more to add other than last nights flash floods and an afternoon of thunderstorms that lasted well into the night.
Well Tuesday flew by so fast I don’t actually remember anything other than betting on a horse called Captain Darling which lost.
Wednesday brought more rain , but also a rather large dose of sunshine which made the day more bearable, also the hostel now has free wifi…..yeeehaaaa.
So Thursday is here and shit it’s been a rough few months for this part of the world floods, cyclones, earthquakes and fucking incompetent politicians.
So have been assured am in for a night of sin as am going out of town tomorrow as the hotel is a bit rural `handy for the Gabba` it said , well yeah if you have fucking wings!!!!!!!
Typical , I move out of town and the races are on with 3 x group 1 races, finding a bus to where I need to go took most of the morning, who the fuck puts a bus station in a fucking shopping centre ????????
So that’s all for now ….except how shit were England the other night.
No one in particular.
All the best.
Ian
Thursday, 10 February 2011
Mum you are not going to like this one.
No picture can't be arsed
Well all has been updated ,banking done and now need to be prudent with the pennies, however, if you are sensible you can get by on A$40 a day it means staying in ,but can have a good Friday night out to make up for it.
Just know the credit card bill will be huge this month and am determined to not use it after it arrives ,well over a A$1000 already ,nearer A$1500 if truth be known.
Got a feeling pissed off M last night as she keeps hinting at this new side of me she has seen ,so will get the fishing trip sorted and look to heading out maybe Perth or Melbourne, will see what accommodation is working out at and where I can fly home from easiest. Will see if anything on worth seeing maybe even Tasmania.
Had a quiet couple of days, but at least my gambling is starting to bear fruit a few winners and put some on the dogs tonight. last night met up with M and watched the end of the cricket, another winning bet but how can you not defend 333,they need to stop bowling short for a start and be more clinical in field settings allowing a team easy singles keeps them in the game, shut them off and force the batsman to hit runs rather than drop down for a single. Apart from that have not gone out, just a carton of wine and DVD’s .Poor M is snowed under at work and doing 12/14 hour days and the BF has discovered his nice side and suppose that has to be hard for her, so many mixed signals not a clue what’s happening so just going with the flow and chilling out with it all.
Have talked about a weekend in Sydney 19/20th of Feb , which I think will be a good time to depart for home, so will get online and start looking at flights ,may spend a couple of extra days there to see if I can catch up with Jezza for an evenings drinking .
I am hoping to catch up with Coxey tonight, Caxton Street was favourite ,but it’s the Chinese new year so maybe Chinatown is in order. Well George was a no show , but got a text this morning explaining all, even a hint of returning to BLCC next season which would be a good thing for us.
Got a late night call from M ,not really saying much ,but then got another saying she was outside my front door. So have invited her round for a meal tonight which is on the stove and then no doubt we will end up in the valley somewhere, which will get messy. Actually had a night in with our newest bestest friends Vicky + Adam from Essex not that we needed telling.
Phil has sorted the fishing and BBQ out so many thanks for that should be a good day as the weather is fantastic. Had a lovely lazy day today but will get more active next week ,once I have sorted out more accommodation this place is cheap and clean so will rebook here once I see someone to arrange said matter. Well weekend was a rather quiet affair ,Saturday stayed in and watched 20/20 final. Sunday popped up to Caboolture and a days fishing in and around Bribie Island did not catch a thing but was a good day got a tan / burnt and had a BBQ later and worked our way thru 24 bottles of beer. Woke up in time for the superbowl not a classic, but thrown away by Pittsburg,to many unforced errors and hats off to GB for being so clinical.
So am now back in hotel and bored , the highlight tonight will be cooking a chilli and watching the crappy TV, there again can’t be as bad as England’s batting last night.
The sun burn is now beginning to be a pain but at least got an excuse not to shave. Well I have to say the chilli was awesome, got to share it with Eugene the token German who actually believed in sharing stuff , like he shares my rice pan my chilli my washing up, where the fuck was he when Poland was on the agenda, Poland just another example of a country we went to war to defend ,6 years and 10,000,000 dead later we get rid of Hitler and give them Lenin/Stalin ,they must be so grateful. I wonder who Iraq will end up with, personally I think Azaruddin the Iranian guy will be 1st in line, but hey ho as long as the yanks keep there pipeline to an abundant stock of oil ….who the fuck cares right !!!!!!!!!!
So welcome to Tuesday a stroll around town, and an afternoon planning and preparing dinner, yep you guessed it , M was coming round. So burgers and salad was dutifully prepared, tasted good as well. Had set up a Chinese laundry in room due to weather , but at least had some dry clothes to wear on Wednesday, where the plan was to hit the dogs , but felt so knackered will do that Thursday evening instead, might actually be someone else there as well.
Will start planning stuff soon ,will book this up for 7 more days,17th, and then see what’s about.
So Wednesday was spent looking forward to The Magnificent 7 on TV only to discover come start time that we don’t have that channel, which really ruined the evening so got drunk watching a combination of Lost,V and anything else I could find. Have awoken up late and now just killing time before getting train to dog track and observing my first ever Aussie dog meet. Have arranged a nights footy on Saturday, Brisbane v Gold coast….local derby and then hit the Valley for the Manc derby, how cool will that be.
Have to say that having observed the political parties at work here have no doubt that these MP’s getting sent to jail in the uk will come here upon release as between the two of them here ,pretty useless the opposition’s guy is just an idiot who can’t seem to have an idea of his own, the PM is openly atheist unmarried and more than likely owns loads of comfortable shoes, not that either of these facts bother me in the slightest ,in fact I would vote for her, but can you imagine a gay atheist running the UK, shit man that would be so cool, do you think we could go round and burn down churches, synagogues and mosques, maybe all them religious fuck ups would fuck off back to the to the hypocritical whores that spawned them and ruin there own countries.
While being topical my one man mission to convert the Aussie to being more like us by bringing in the rain etc, I now just need to convince these twats that it was the global warming that caused it ,not me, but the Chinese burning all the coal that this lot sends them, so no coal to China , economy suffers Queensland Rail ( which has just announced 33% of staff to go over the next 6 months , this is just 3 months after being privatised ????? Sound familiar ???) goes tits up bringing down the the Queensland government at the same time, the inquiry into why the dam was not lowered of capacity before the floods came therefore avoiding the fact that when they did empty it to avoid it bursting ,they would not of added to the flood water, are you guys aware that they knew for about 7 days that the flood was coming but they still did nothing to allow the dam ( which was full to bursting at the time) to empty ,allowing it to take the flood water), this will no doubt expose the profiteering by the water companies here that also donate thousands to the political parties and will, without question donate again, to arrange a clean bill of health for its actions during the flood and then not have to accept any responsibility for the damage the flooding caused, which has to be seen to be believed.
This brings me nicely to the biggest bastards of all time, no not people in advertising, these cunts are worse…..INSURANCE what a fucling parasitic occupation this is, are you aware according to these wankers there are 4 types of flooding, so these cunts are working out which kind is cheapest for them, hiring there own specialists to decide which type of flooding has occurred, you can see it coming, one will announce riverine flooding as its best for them , another will say flash flooding due to heavy rain fall as that works out cheaper for them, and again these wankers donate so much to the political parties that they will get away with it ,these cunts should be treated like Hitler treated the Jews and fucking exterminated. The worst thing is that even if you have got flood cover you have to of stipulated which type and some companies don’t cover for all four types anyway , they just will reject the claim full stop ,its going to go mental when it all comes out.
And just to clarify my earlier statement about Jews please feel free to add Muslims, Catholics and any other fucking idiot who’s life is so sad and lacking meaning they need to believe in some thing that does not exist, not having a go at Jews in particular, they are just as bad as the ragheads and not a foreskin between them , sorta makes you curious don’t it ???
Two religions at war for thousands of years, yet they both choose to cut off the same piece of skin !!!!!
You can draw your own conclusions , I drew mine years ago ………………fucking hypocrites.
All the best.
Lots of Frank at the mo.
Up the Shots
Ian
Well all has been updated ,banking done and now need to be prudent with the pennies, however, if you are sensible you can get by on A$40 a day it means staying in ,but can have a good Friday night out to make up for it.
Just know the credit card bill will be huge this month and am determined to not use it after it arrives ,well over a A$1000 already ,nearer A$1500 if truth be known.
Got a feeling pissed off M last night as she keeps hinting at this new side of me she has seen ,so will get the fishing trip sorted and look to heading out maybe Perth or Melbourne, will see what accommodation is working out at and where I can fly home from easiest. Will see if anything on worth seeing maybe even Tasmania.
Had a quiet couple of days, but at least my gambling is starting to bear fruit a few winners and put some on the dogs tonight. last night met up with M and watched the end of the cricket, another winning bet but how can you not defend 333,they need to stop bowling short for a start and be more clinical in field settings allowing a team easy singles keeps them in the game, shut them off and force the batsman to hit runs rather than drop down for a single. Apart from that have not gone out, just a carton of wine and DVD’s .Poor M is snowed under at work and doing 12/14 hour days and the BF has discovered his nice side and suppose that has to be hard for her, so many mixed signals not a clue what’s happening so just going with the flow and chilling out with it all.
Have talked about a weekend in Sydney 19/20th of Feb , which I think will be a good time to depart for home, so will get online and start looking at flights ,may spend a couple of extra days there to see if I can catch up with Jezza for an evenings drinking .
I am hoping to catch up with Coxey tonight, Caxton Street was favourite ,but it’s the Chinese new year so maybe Chinatown is in order. Well George was a no show , but got a text this morning explaining all, even a hint of returning to BLCC next season which would be a good thing for us.
Got a late night call from M ,not really saying much ,but then got another saying she was outside my front door. So have invited her round for a meal tonight which is on the stove and then no doubt we will end up in the valley somewhere, which will get messy. Actually had a night in with our newest bestest friends Vicky + Adam from Essex not that we needed telling.
Phil has sorted the fishing and BBQ out so many thanks for that should be a good day as the weather is fantastic. Had a lovely lazy day today but will get more active next week ,once I have sorted out more accommodation this place is cheap and clean so will rebook here once I see someone to arrange said matter. Well weekend was a rather quiet affair ,Saturday stayed in and watched 20/20 final. Sunday popped up to Caboolture and a days fishing in and around Bribie Island did not catch a thing but was a good day got a tan / burnt and had a BBQ later and worked our way thru 24 bottles of beer. Woke up in time for the superbowl not a classic, but thrown away by Pittsburg,to many unforced errors and hats off to GB for being so clinical.
So am now back in hotel and bored , the highlight tonight will be cooking a chilli and watching the crappy TV, there again can’t be as bad as England’s batting last night.
The sun burn is now beginning to be a pain but at least got an excuse not to shave. Well I have to say the chilli was awesome, got to share it with Eugene the token German who actually believed in sharing stuff , like he shares my rice pan my chilli my washing up, where the fuck was he when Poland was on the agenda, Poland just another example of a country we went to war to defend ,6 years and 10,000,000 dead later we get rid of Hitler and give them Lenin/Stalin ,they must be so grateful. I wonder who Iraq will end up with, personally I think Azaruddin the Iranian guy will be 1st in line, but hey ho as long as the yanks keep there pipeline to an abundant stock of oil ….who the fuck cares right !!!!!!!!!!
So welcome to Tuesday a stroll around town, and an afternoon planning and preparing dinner, yep you guessed it , M was coming round. So burgers and salad was dutifully prepared, tasted good as well. Had set up a Chinese laundry in room due to weather , but at least had some dry clothes to wear on Wednesday, where the plan was to hit the dogs , but felt so knackered will do that Thursday evening instead, might actually be someone else there as well.
Will start planning stuff soon ,will book this up for 7 more days,17th, and then see what’s about.
So Wednesday was spent looking forward to The Magnificent 7 on TV only to discover come start time that we don’t have that channel, which really ruined the evening so got drunk watching a combination of Lost,V and anything else I could find. Have awoken up late and now just killing time before getting train to dog track and observing my first ever Aussie dog meet. Have arranged a nights footy on Saturday, Brisbane v Gold coast….local derby and then hit the Valley for the Manc derby, how cool will that be.
Have to say that having observed the political parties at work here have no doubt that these MP’s getting sent to jail in the uk will come here upon release as between the two of them here ,pretty useless the opposition’s guy is just an idiot who can’t seem to have an idea of his own, the PM is openly atheist unmarried and more than likely owns loads of comfortable shoes, not that either of these facts bother me in the slightest ,in fact I would vote for her, but can you imagine a gay atheist running the UK, shit man that would be so cool, do you think we could go round and burn down churches, synagogues and mosques, maybe all them religious fuck ups would fuck off back to the to the hypocritical whores that spawned them and ruin there own countries.
While being topical my one man mission to convert the Aussie to being more like us by bringing in the rain etc, I now just need to convince these twats that it was the global warming that caused it ,not me, but the Chinese burning all the coal that this lot sends them, so no coal to China , economy suffers Queensland Rail ( which has just announced 33% of staff to go over the next 6 months , this is just 3 months after being privatised ????? Sound familiar ???) goes tits up bringing down the the Queensland government at the same time, the inquiry into why the dam was not lowered of capacity before the floods came therefore avoiding the fact that when they did empty it to avoid it bursting ,they would not of added to the flood water, are you guys aware that they knew for about 7 days that the flood was coming but they still did nothing to allow the dam ( which was full to bursting at the time) to empty ,allowing it to take the flood water), this will no doubt expose the profiteering by the water companies here that also donate thousands to the political parties and will, without question donate again, to arrange a clean bill of health for its actions during the flood and then not have to accept any responsibility for the damage the flooding caused, which has to be seen to be believed.
This brings me nicely to the biggest bastards of all time, no not people in advertising, these cunts are worse…..INSURANCE what a fucling parasitic occupation this is, are you aware according to these wankers there are 4 types of flooding, so these cunts are working out which kind is cheapest for them, hiring there own specialists to decide which type of flooding has occurred, you can see it coming, one will announce riverine flooding as its best for them , another will say flash flooding due to heavy rain fall as that works out cheaper for them, and again these wankers donate so much to the political parties that they will get away with it ,these cunts should be treated like Hitler treated the Jews and fucking exterminated. The worst thing is that even if you have got flood cover you have to of stipulated which type and some companies don’t cover for all four types anyway , they just will reject the claim full stop ,its going to go mental when it all comes out.
And just to clarify my earlier statement about Jews please feel free to add Muslims, Catholics and any other fucking idiot who’s life is so sad and lacking meaning they need to believe in some thing that does not exist, not having a go at Jews in particular, they are just as bad as the ragheads and not a foreskin between them , sorta makes you curious don’t it ???
Two religions at war for thousands of years, yet they both choose to cut off the same piece of skin !!!!!
You can draw your own conclusions , I drew mine years ago ………………fucking hypocrites.
All the best.
Lots of Frank at the mo.
Up the Shots
Ian
Monday, 31 January 2011
Make what you will of the tattoo...............
The joy of being a complete stranger is that every now and again you discover a little goldmine and apart from M,last night offered up a lovely little restaurant where the food was great and the brusetta was exactly that. Will recommend stuffed chicken breast ,however can not remember the name of the place, its down past the tabernacle and on the left of the next crossroads out of town(Hollywood bar and Grill).
So am now in room, thanking anyone who will listen that I did not wake up for the West Ham game this morning it looked suicide material to me, and drinking M’s wine, cheers babe !!!!!!
The sun has been out for 4 days now and its great, have a balcony but no sun ,also now have 3 new polo shirts - Lacoste at £40 a pop …….bargain !!!!!
Got hold of Phil so should be at the Wheelbarrow tomorrow night about 20-30, also move back to the kookaburra tomorrow not ideal but ideally placed. Have the weekend to myself so suntan and alcohol abuse are planned ,England v Convicts on Sunday, not sure if anyone else wants to go yet !!!
So hopefully these next 10 days should determine the length of this sabbatical as will do calculations on these days and get a rough idea of amount needed to survive, have not brought a cigarette since being here and apart from 5/6 of M’s on Monday have not smoked at all !!!!!!!!
Oh My Me how good will that first one taste ??????
Wow can you imagine that …lifelong smoker comes back from Oz as one of those whiney cuntish ex smokers ???????? How fucking surreal would that be` put it out Clinton, think of Theo, do you want him to grow up and be better than you at every sport imaginable ,all because you smoke !!!!!!`.
So am planning a quiet night in, and catch up with the TV, scary actually, as am now looking at my trunks thinking WOW you did two lengths yesterday without coughing up a lung ,surely you can do four today ????????
M went to her folks today and at last sighting was on the beach catching rays, await with baited breath to hear from her tonight.
So get totally confused by texts and apparently I should of insisted she stayed, FFS what am I a fucking mind reader for all I know she couldn’t stand another night of my snoring, crap sex or any of a hundred different things. I give up, seriously how do these people stay married for 20+ years I can’t seem to manage 4 days without it all going tits up.
Anyway have moved back to the Kookaburra and washing being done, will chill for a while and then get some shopping in and prepare to hit the Valley with Phil at 8ish.So have chicken marinating with garlic + chilli and lime juice, washing all dry and am as confused as always.
Have to say Brisbane is lovely when the sun is shining, however rain is forecast tonight !!!!!
Oh and I am smoking again A$32 for a pouch of baccy, but have hopefully picked out all of tomorrows winners.
Well the winners have evaded me yet again,and as for last night all a bit of a blur I’m afraid ,especially after Phils herbal cigarette not sure what on earth was in it but it knocked me sideways,but still a good night and found a couple of lively bars.Also found great mirth in cheering on Andy’ABE’Murray’s opponent ,cause he is a cock and even looks like one with that haircut.
Will try to arrange a meet tonight and clear the air once and for all. Ironically found a horse running later today called Kill ian rather apt don’t you think so had 10 bucks on it.Tickets for the game tomorrow are $45 at the cheapest level not sure how that works as the ground is just a bowl ??? So depending on M whether I go or not, for some strange reason have a decidedly ‘Darlington’ feeling surrounding me , that was also a strange night out and Bob pulled there as well.Strange the things you think of……wonder if that was my moment of clarity and the world will all make sense now,yep I’m a dreamer !!!!!!
Oh what to do when you have nothing to do a conundrum in it’s self.Will go and get a bottle if no joy with tonight and drown my self in the cheapist and nastiest wine I can find and contemplate a trip back to the rock perhaps at least life was simple there, Clinton moves out on the 3/3/2011 and my flight is booked for the 23/3/2011 just another useless titbit of shite information for you.
This café is just rammed with Chinese/Korean students its no secret that they will take over the industrial world,they are already half way there, did hear they own 1/3 of all euros and most of Africa is being propped up by them to ensure they have access to minerals etc,and still we allow all our money grabbing industrial powers to move production there making 1000s unemployed here and providing employment there ,all be it slave labour.then once well and truly established they will find themselves being held to ransom by the Chinese,new taxes,shipping costs you name it .Its so fucking short sighted and money orientated ,it beggars belief how we have just sat back and let this happen.
Then again the gook opposite me has a great pair of tits and a cleavage that is just begging for baby oil and my dick to be rubbed along it in a thrusting fashion.
Twelve gooks and me in a starbucks is this the start of a revolution !
Must stop these thoughts ran out of porn a long time ago, but they are seriously a great pair !!!!!!!
So having successfully lost my money on the nags am contemplating another sunbathing session back at the hostel, at least they remembered me and gave me a free beer.
Have half a chicken in the fridge and a bowl of chopped up legs and thighs in a marinade , so will finish that tonight and knock up a curry in 32 degree heat with the breasts that are left with some of that paste I brought back from Thailand the customs were so interested in.
I have to go the sun has gone in and there are now 14 gooks to my one.
Oh and by the way if you ever go to Thailand and want to buy anything that is size orientated try it on first, very very important,goes for condoms as well.
Well the air was well and truly cleared and we are both aware of where the other is coming from, so shared a cab to the Gabba and luckily for me a very nice convict offered me a ticket for A$20,which was great as the cheapest tickets left on sale were for A$70.
The game turned out to bee as drab as expected England have missed the boat and just want to go home, Ashes won, should just leave the also rans here, Christ the world cup starts in 3 weeks.No bloody chance of winning that,India , Sri Lanka or as a dark horse West Indies you may laugh, but you heard it here first.
The convicts turned out in force, the fancy dress was cool their sledging not…..questioning every player about his sexuality is boring and old hat , ordering massala and pompadoms from Shaznad was plain stupid, so despite the CA urgings these idiots are still miles behind the barmy army, if truth be known they don’t get it at all.
Walked back to the pig in 40 minutes and watched the first half of Arsenal v Huddersfield town good game and would of liked to of stayed but tired from lack of sleep and wanted to chill out with wine and DVD this was successfully accomplished and woke up this a.m feeling pucker.
M’s first day back so will leave her alone and try to update this and other stuff when I find some free wifi.
Well in the words of Tex Avery.....`thats all folks`
All music is now a repeat of previous days.
All the best.
Ian
Wednesday, 26 January 2011
Getting fucked over with a fake smile and a snidey sneer !!!!
Good morning all, had a lovely flight in a twin prop plane over to Phuket,transferd to Patong and checked into my new hotel.
And isn't it next door to a fecking building site so fron 8am to 6pm the cunts are drilling into the wall tying in new brickwork , this does not fit well into a Changover lifestyle I may have to get some practice in !!!!!!
The good news is, it is hot and the beach is cool and tarts are everywhere, not that I am looking for one just looking at them.
Have met up with a mate of Neil's who just happens to own a bar which makes life a lot easier as do not have to worry about getting rolled over on the Bangla road, free pool as well and does a bit of grub.Sorted.
Have finally found `the walking dead` on DVD and the room has a player so can catch up on the 5 episodes I missed.
Am also actually missing `the rock` life was so simple there, this place is a different world ,lots of hustle and bustle, locals more aggressive even the `no sex`massage girls get physical and try to grab you.
So the routine kicks in breakfast walk round shops watch a few dvds ,shower shave and something else then hit the `goodsports`bar which Dave part owns, few games of pool and taxi back to hotel.
This morning booked minibus to airport brought a few essentials and had a massage which involves ting ting climbing all over me and jumping/walking all over me so am now totally chilled out and sat in room watching` Spartacus`.
Will hit the town tonight a bit later than normal and spend the night watching the footy.
Well that was shit, open air concert next to daves bar and he had had enough and shut the bar before I got there so watched Aussie v Iraq, Harry Kewell got the winner thought he was retired ,and went back to hotel and got results on PC, go on you shots what a result just need the fans that dullen lost to return and I forsee a push into the play offs.
So am now in reception and awaiting mini bus to airport in 90 mins time,apprehensive and nervous all at the same time, the flight is 9 hours and I land at 06-30 just hope the hotel can sort me out a room early otherwise will crash in their reception and trust me if that happens a room well be found pronto !!!!!
So have now made it into airport only to find an empty terminal, so much for checking in and hitting the duty free.Will just have to sit tight and wait for the check in to open, load of fuking bollocks when you think about it.....plane has lets say 200 pax 5 desks open 40 pax per desk at 3 mins each bearing in mind some families of 4 will be thru quicker then 4 handsome fellows like me who just captivate the desk handlers.Therefore 40 x 3 =120 , 2 hours to check the plane in ,bear with me on this.Now 2 hours to check in and they tell you to check in 120 mins before departure, r u getting this.That means the check in desk should be up and running 4 hours before take off by their guidelines and are they, are they fucking bollocks.......so the moral of this story is that Pacific Blue are very likely to be joining my list of cunts along with Delta + Qantas . Bangkok + BA are fine , but PB has a lot to do not to be on that list.A free upgrade will be a start as would copious amounts of alcohol !!!!
Well they can stay off the list for now, any airline whose entertainment system has 2.5 hours of Bill Hicks gets a thumbs up from me , plus the ability to create a playlist from some 500 albums including the floyd,nirvane,JC,Bowie et al can`t be all bad .A distinct lack of alcohol and crappy food brings them back down ,but all in all a pleasent experience.
And now for aussie customs.......cunts.Obviously a single guy coming into Oz from Thailand may raise an eyebrow from the thought police that infest airports under the guise of `border control` you know the type, I do not want you in my country you must have drugs on you. Back in England we call these neandrathals BNP /National Front perhaps aussies should realise that while they were having fun fuking me over ....how many zipperheads got through with Kilo's of coke stoved up their arses, I know that we brought the ashes back and the guys fuking me had never known a home defeat before, but to waste 45 minutes on me taking my luggage apart when surely the fact that a sniffer dog had been thru it and me twice told them that I was not carrying they still had the ' just doing my job' attitude,so what did they find ? The night before I left, to use up some Bhat I got 5 packs of fags, at the airport knowing the limit was
RANT OVER.
Anyway that was the first time got done and probably the smallest amount I have ever attempted to smuggle.So no real hard feelings.
Got the train to hotel checked in and had a few hours kip, while waiting for my aussie friend to join me after her weekend away in Sydney.
Well Michelle arrived about 14:30 and spent the rest of the day catching up on news and stuff.
Well have spent the morning wandering around the river and they are still clearing up after the floods got some food and drink and will have a picnic in the room. Picnic turned into regatta into an evenings drinking and room service.
It's now 14:00 on Tuesday and I am jacobed to say the least so draw your own conclusions, she is having such an effect on me I am about to go swimming....how pointless is that ,seven years at Palatia and I have never been in their pool, 24hrs with chelle and am going swimming .So a couple of laps were done,it is a small pool.
Went out for a meal and a few beers and am now looking forward to Austrailia Day a bit like St george's back home only these guys are given the day off and encouraged ,by all accounts to go out and bash a non aussie.Apparently british is OK, but not taking any chances.
Late getting up,Michelle can't sleep Oh what is the poor girl to do and am now drinking cofffee in a cafe, the sun is out and it's beautiful, the only cloud on the horizon ,apart from them fucking customs idiots, is I now have to find accomadation for the rest of my stay whose duration is far from settled.So have a fully charged up phone and 24hrs worth of internet access it could be a long day,but first we are going for a stroll around the areas to see whats out there.Well took a walk up to the Regatta Hotel a local land mark apparently, a few beers and a taxi back to the hotel.However you can see patriotic they are here, the local park had the artillery guns out for the 21 gun salute and the streets are filled with people decked out in Aussie regalia a far more concerted effort than St Georges day , but then today is a national holiday for them.
Mainly The Doors last night.
All the best.
Ian 250grams that was all I brought, so them 100 fags that cost 400 TB (£8) meant that I was over the limit and as I did not declare it left me liable to a fine although when you read the aussie customs card it says more than 250 fags or more than 250grams of tobacco, which I did not have, therefore they are illiterate cunts as well any way to end rant ,to keep all my contraband it would cost me A$ 140, pretty much street value of what I had so thought fuck it you keep it and I will stop smoking while here and fuck your taxes and I will pass on all the stuff I learnt while being interrogated to more nefarious people so they can flood your streets with crap cocaine and give these fucking idiots a kick up the arse when they are asked why are you spending 45 minutes to cane someone for having 100 fags when the streets are full of cocaine or for that matter ,why are they quite happy for a community known as Nimbin to happen were it is basically a do as you want town and smoking pot is turned a blind eye to, and you show me any fuking heroin / coke addict who did not start on pot and I will show you a fuking idiot.
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